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January 9, 2017 · 48 Comments

My Experience Of Counselling: A Helpful Journey

Mama's Life, Parenting And Kids Activities

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Today I’m going to share something on the blog I’ve never shared before. Last year I completed two and a half years of counselling. That’s right. I had been having private counselling or therapy, whatever you choose to call it for the past two-plus years and now I’ve finished the journey.

Counselling

Contents

  • My Experience Of Counselling
  • Counselling Can Really Help
    • More on my experience of counselling
  • Counselling As A Blogger
  • It Really Does Help

My Experience Of Counselling

Having counselling is not something I’m ashamed of. It’s something that was needed to help me overcome and move on from some difficult situations which I have faced as a child and young woman and as an adult who has lived in an abusive marriage. I never knew just how far I would come with the right counsellor.

When I started my therapy I was a different person. Someone who had been treated badly at times and as a result I had lost my confidence. I struggled to say no to people and stand up for what I wanted. I found myself justifying my every move, constantly apologising and asking permission for the silliest of things. I’d even ask my husband John if it was okay to have a glass of milk. He would kindly remind me I don’t need to ask permission but I’d developed a habit of asking permission and that amongst many other things needed to be addressed.

I know being mistreated in the past has had a massive effect on my self-worth and confidence and it really did affect the way I reacted and acted and how I felt about myself. I’ve slowly worked on different aspects of my life and although I still have the terrible habit of continuously saying sorry, (something I’m not sure I will ever overcome completely) I have grown so much and am in such a better place emotionally.

Counselling Can Really Help

Having counselling does not make you any less of a person. It does not make you emotionally unstable or mentally ill. Sometimes we just need to talk through the experiences which affect one’s life and the chance to get therapy was just what I needed to move forward in life.

More on my experience of counselling

Back in 2013, I had no idea how long I would need counselling. I had no idea if it would work, or if it could help me to overcome my past and get stronger but it has and I’m really grateful for the opportunity and for my husband for the financial sacrifice he allowed us to make for the treatment I needed.

smile

Having counselling not only allowed me to grow in confidence and discuss some terrible experiences. It also helped me to learn to live with my current issues, my current health problems which will always be here and to learn to go forward with a smile and purpose no matter what.

Counselling As A Blogger

I don’t plan to write anything else on the topic of counselling as a blogger. It’s something which is very personal to me but I can say it has really helped me and I’m really pleased with my progress. I have goals, I am a mother and a wife, a writer and blogger and I feel happy that I have a sense of purpose and a plan for me.

It Really Does Help

The nasty moments in life, I have been through will always exist, they are a part of me, but they are also what makes me a stronger person, a better person and a more understanding person. I’m grateful to my counsellor for the support she has been to me over the past two and a half years but is excited to move on now and take what I have learnt with me into the unknown.

Angela 

About Angela Milnes

Angela Milnes is a Qualified Early Years Teacher who has specialised in Preschool and Kindergarten teaching. She has a wealth of experience teaching young children and is passionate about kids crafts and having fun as a family. Angela has also taught cooking skills and loves to share both family recipes and easy instant pot recipes here on The Inspiration Edit. Follow her on Pinterest!

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Talya says

    January 9, 2017 at 9:14 am

    I agree – counselling is not something to be ashamed of by a very brave move to take responsibility for your life hon xx

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 10, 2017 at 5:42 am

      Thanks Talya. It’s a great thing when you get the opportunity. It’s not always affordable or easy to access.

      Reply
  2. Dannii says

    January 9, 2017 at 10:15 am

    I have had counselling a few times in my life and found it really helpful to speak to someone outside of the situation.

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 10, 2017 at 5:37 am

      It can be useful talking to someone who is NOT part of everyday life.

      Reply
  3. StressedMum says

    January 9, 2017 at 11:01 am

    I fully support counselling, and realy believe it can help, I have had it briefly in the past and it is something that has been talked about for my Daughter, but we could not find someone who could help her with her illness and understand her illness, we did try with someone from CAHMS but she did not like her and refuses to go back x

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 10, 2017 at 5:36 am

      it took a long time for me to find the right counsellor and I think that really helped.

      Reply
  4. Milly Youngman says

    January 9, 2017 at 2:14 pm

    This is such a brave and informative post to share – I’m glad counselling has been helpful for you!

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 10, 2017 at 5:35 am

      Thankyou Milly

      Reply
  5. Sarah Bailey says

    January 9, 2017 at 5:12 pm

    Thank you for sharing something so very personal with us. Counselling is a wonderful tool to help us work through issues and difficulties and enable us to move on in life in a more healthy and productive manner. All the best to you x

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 10, 2017 at 5:35 am

      I totally agree Sarah. It’s a tool we can use to help us in life!

      Reply
  6. Liz Mays says

    January 9, 2017 at 5:52 pm

    I think that’s one of the smartest things you can do to help you deal with issues. I’m glad you stuck with it all the way through. I think therapy is brilliant, and honestly, everyone could use it.

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 10, 2017 at 5:34 am

      Thanks. It was not cheap but made a huge difference and has really helped.

      Reply
  7. hannah says

    January 9, 2017 at 6:42 pm

    Counselling can be a good thing. I had it when my mom passed away a few years back and it really helped me

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 10, 2017 at 5:34 am

      I think it can be very useful for many situations.

      Reply
  8. Rachel says

    January 9, 2017 at 9:14 pm

    Well done for talking about this, I can imagine that counselling would be helpful. At times, I’ve thought about maybe going to talk to someone xo

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 10, 2017 at 5:33 am

      I think EVERYONE could do with some therapy. It would make the world a better place.

      Reply
  9. Deborah Nicholas says

    January 9, 2017 at 10:56 pm

    Im glad counselling is working for you and i love that quote – so true!

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 10, 2017 at 5:31 am

      Thanks Deborah! It has been a blessing and a wonderful thing.

      Reply
  10. Sarah says

    January 9, 2017 at 10:38 pm

    I freaking love this post.
    I’m so sorry for everything you’ve had to go through, no one deserves that..BUT…WELL DONE you for completing your therapy and I am so glad it has benefited you.

    No one should ever feel less of a person for having therapy, if anything it makes them stronger for being brave and saying..yes, I have a problem, I need to talk about.

    You should be very proud of yourself lovely xxx

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 10, 2017 at 5:32 am

      thanks so much. It is something I didn’t tell anyone about but now i’ve completed I’ felt okay to share.

      Reply
  11. Ana De- Jesus says

    January 9, 2017 at 11:33 pm

    I used to do the same, even in my own house I would ask if I could have food or use the bathroom because I didn’t know what I could and couldn’t do, largely because of the way I had been mistreated. I think it is amazing how much you have accomplished in such a short amount of time and well done for showing that its ok to have counselling.

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 10, 2017 at 5:31 am

      thanks Ana. It’s something that happens with mistreatment but yes, I have come a long way ๐Ÿ™‚ Thanks for sharing.

      Reply
  12. Annie B says

    January 10, 2017 at 6:03 am

    Counselling is so good sometimes as we do often need that external outlet. I’m glad you feel better since having it and it really isn’t anything to ever be embarrassed about, so I’m pleased you’ve spoken out. I had terrible anxiety so I went for CBT therapy. That really helped me put my thoughts and worries into perspective.

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 13, 2017 at 5:09 pm

      Agreed! I think CBT is great for anxiety and worries!

      Reply
  13. Stephanie Merry says

    January 10, 2017 at 9:16 am

    I’ve had counselling in the past and it was one of the best things I ever did x

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 13, 2017 at 5:11 pm

      Me too! So very useful and has changed my life.

      Reply
  14. Rhian Westbury says

    January 10, 2017 at 9:32 am

    That’s fantastic news that you felt councilling helped you. People should not be ashamed for needing it as everyone copes with things in different ways x

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 13, 2017 at 5:13 pm

      Thanks Rhian. It is a great tool for many of lifes difficulties and experiences.

      Reply
  15. Anosa says

    January 10, 2017 at 10:33 am

    I think councelling is better than any other type of treatment for depression and/or anxiety personally. Just being able to get things off your chest is like a weight off. Also talking to a stranger is easier to me than talking to my family, I don’t think anyone should ever be ashamed of having gone through councelling, it can literally save your life.

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 13, 2017 at 5:13 pm

      Agreed. It is a great treatment. Shame it is not more available to those who could benefit.

      Reply
  16. Charlotte says

    January 10, 2017 at 10:46 am

    I have had counselling. Unfortunately it had to end prematurely as we relocated and there wasn’t a specialist in our new area. I love that quote and I’m going to remember it! xx

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 13, 2017 at 5:11 pm

      So sorry to hear that. I found when I had it with services or public it ended in a few weeks and was not sufficient… paying for long term was the only way it worked for me.

      Reply
  17. emma white says

    January 10, 2017 at 6:23 pm

    Due to an 11 year abusive marriage Iv had counselling most of my life and then intense therapy with shrinks due to being diagnosed with Bipolar and PTSD and yes it saved my life

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 13, 2017 at 5:03 pm

      Counselling in so important especially if you have experienced abuse. it can really help.

      Reply
  18. melissa major says

    January 10, 2017 at 7:13 pm

    Im glad the counselling helped you move forward, that quote is so positive too

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 13, 2017 at 5:08 pm

      Thanks Melissa. ๐Ÿ™‚ Glad you like the quote!

      Reply
  19. Jemma says

    January 11, 2017 at 8:41 am

    Counselling is definitely not something to be ashamed of. Getting help is such a brave step.

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 13, 2017 at 5:00 pm

      I agree. It is empowering and beneficial when done right.

      Reply
  20. Francesca says

    January 11, 2017 at 2:06 pm

    This is so lovely!!! I’m so glad that through counselling you were able to tackle the past and allow yourself the freedom you deserve! I titally agree that counselling is an amazing tool, sometimes you just need someone who has no judgement to sit down and talk over things you usually wouldn’t tell anyone else! In your case it seems to have been a great experience!

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 13, 2017 at 4:56 pm

      thanks Francesca. it can be a great tool to help people.

      Reply
  21. Harriet from Toby & Roo says

    January 11, 2017 at 5:57 pm

    I commend you lovely, I don’t have time for counsellors, I’ve never had a positive experience with one and I don’t think I’ll ever give another the chance!

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 13, 2017 at 3:10 pm

      I think our experiences do shape how we feel about certain things. This was my first counsellor where it actually worked!

      Reply
  22. Lubka Henry says

    January 11, 2017 at 7:28 pm

    I’m so happy you’ve done it and that it has helped you so much! You’re amazing and very strong lady ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 13, 2017 at 3:07 pm

      Thanks Lubka. It was not easy and I’ve tried it in the past and its sucked but this time I had a good counsellor.

      Reply
  23. Baby Isabella says

    January 11, 2017 at 9:36 pm

    Theres no shame in therapy or counselling Angela. My mummy’s sister had conunselling and it was very beneficial x

    Reply
    • Angela says

      January 13, 2017 at 3:05 pm

      Agreed. It can be very beneficial to many!

      Reply
  24. Kate Tunstall, The Less-Refined Mind says

    February 1, 2017 at 1:05 pm

    Such a positive review of counselling – it’s something I too advocate. I’m really pleased to read that it’s helped you move forward.

    Thanks for linking up to #outsidemywindow, I’d love to have you back again next time.

    Reply
    • Angela says

      February 4, 2017 at 1:40 pm

      I’m glad you liked this.

      Reply

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