Many people forget about how their divorce impacts the people around them as it is going on, particularly their children. There are many challenges to successful Co-Parenting During A Divorce, and a lack of awareness about the impact of the divorce process on the children can make this issue worse. You need to be sure that you know what your kids need as you end your marriage so that they are not harmed by the emotional and trying times that are taking place around them.
A skilled family law attorney can help you navigate the divorce process, but you will need to handle some of the work to manage co-parenting as your divorce is going on. When the divorce is finalized, you will have a legal parenting plan that you both have to follow, but until then, the co-parenting work is up to you and your former spouse. Here are some tips to help your kids enjoy time with both of you while you are working out the details of your divorce.
Things to do When Co-Parenting Through a Divorce
No one will ever tell you that co-parenting throughout the divorce process is easy. You will run into all kinds of challenges that you never expected to have to deal with. However, there are some ways to make the process less painful to everyone involved in the breakup. These tips will help you to co-parent your children successfully as you end your marriage.
1. Think of Your Children’s Feelings First
Your children likely have a lot of feelings about the divorce, especially since they don’t get to decide if you break up your marriage or not. You need to speak with your children about their feelings and you need to give them space to express their needs and concerns throughout the process. This allows them to feel like they have some ability to control some aspect of the situation around them and keeps communication open between you and them.
Children often feel like they cannot express themselves during a divorce, and they do not want to get involved in the fighting that is common between former spouses. You need to give them space to express what they need so that they do not feel left out or unloved as the divorce evolves.
2. Communicate With Your Ex-Spouse
You and your former partner are going to need to stay in communication throughout the divorce process, even if you don’t wish to. You need to arrange time spent with the children and you need to be sure that you are not failing to meet the needs of the children as a unit. For better or for worse, you two are still their parents and you need to work as a team to raise them even after you are no longer married. Communication cannot be turned into a legal requirement per se, so you and your ex will need to figure out how to talk about things while you are raising your children.
3. Parent as a Team
You will still have to parent as a team, even after you are divorced. You will have to work out a way to work together as a team in the best interest of your children. They have no choice in this situation, so you will both need to offer the consistency that is available to them during and after the divorce. This is the best way to keep your children safe and happy as you are navigating the divorce process. Parenting as a team, albeit one that no longer lives together, is critical for the well-being of your children.
4. Make Sure to Keep to Routines
Your children are going to feel the lack of stability in their lives during the divorce very acutely. You will be able to help them adjust to a new normal if you keep as many routines consistent as possible. Make sure that your kids are able to do the things that they love, even during your divorce. They need to get to sports, activities, and friends’ houses just like they did before you were divorced. This is one of the key ways that you can support your kids through your divorce. They should not have to miss out on the things that they love just because of the upheaval within your relationship.
5. Make Sure to Think About Parenting Time Carefully
You will want to make sure that you think about the parenting time that you need with your children so that your lawyer can communicate this demand to the judge. Your children deserve to spend time with both of their parents, but that can be difficult if you don’t ask for the time that you need with them. Making sure that the judge knows what you need when it comes to parenting time can help you to support your children after the divorce is complete.
This is one of the areas that people forget to pay attention to when they are in the throes of a divorce, but you can prevent long-term issues by thinking of this factor before the divorce is finalized.
Divorce Can be Hard on Children
Divorce can be tough on kids. Parents who are divorcing need to be sure that they carefully consider the well-being of the children involved in the divorce process. Being able to co-parent during your divorce can be tough, but you and your former spouse can prepare for this part of the divorce by communicating and putting your kids first. Always be sure to communicate with your former spouse about the needs of your children as well and come up with a parenting plan that will keep your kids happy and healthy as the divorce progresses.
Working with a skilled lawyer will make the divorce process much easier for you and your children. You should never leave this aspect of your divorce up to chance. Your children will benefit just like you will if you have the right legal team working on your case.
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