Tough Times Never Last But Tough People Do
I saw a quote the other day that said, tough times never last but tough people do. This quote stood out to me because I’ve been having a tough time lately and it caused me to question whether or not this quote is correct for myself.
I’ve struggled a lot since returning to the UK from New Zealand at the end of August. My health has not been the best and it’s been an ongoing struggle to the point that it’s seriously affected my mental wellbeing.
I became seriously unwell during my visit to NZ to see my family. I developed seriously bad cellulitis on my tummy along with a few abscesses which resulted in a long stay in hospital.
Adrenal Insufficiency And Infections
I have adrenal insufficiency which means my body does not produce the stress hormone cortisol. As a result I have to take medication to try and mimic the cortisol levels of my body which change depending on the stresses on the body.
Having a serious infection caused me to suffer from not only the symptoms of infection but also the symptoms of low cortisol and so it has taken some time for me to recover. It’s been almost 8 weeks. I’ve had minor surgery, 22 dressing changes, completed my antibiotics and am finally healing from the infections of August.
It’s been a long road to recovery and has been difficult on my body. The one thing I have noticed is that over the weeks my body has had more and more pain, my headaches have become worse and I’ve found myself become more and more anxious. I actually think my Vitamin D levels may have dropped again so I am going to have some tests later this week.
It’s been so hard to function. I’ve spent a lot of time in bed sleeping. I find it hard to think clear and have struggled to sleep more than 2-3 hours at a time.
Heck it’s been so hard to concentrate and write a blog post and I’ve struggled to complete small tasks in the home. I’ve had to really rely on others to help me keep afloat at home and to keep this blog going whilst I have been extra unwell more than my usual.
Anxiety Getting Worse
Whilst I have struggled over the past two months, my husband has really had to help me out. Especially when it comes to my mental wellbeing. You see, my anxiety has become worse over the weeks and I’ve seriously struggled with my thoughts and concentration and being able to rest. John is a great help especially when I feel like I am going crazy.
I think I could do with counselling or some kind of therapy to help me, but I am so unwell and exhausted, I can’t see how I would have the energy to even organise it.
When it comes to blogging, we have 6 posts/reviews/collaborations to complete by Christmas and my husband is going to do all the photography and do the majority of the work to get this work done. I really can’t blog the way I did earlier this year and whilst I am not quitting I am taking time out and instead of writing new content, I am re-sharing crafts and recipe posts from the past, content that is relevant this season but not new.
I really can’t blog right now. I can write my feelings down here but I can’t sit and think to write an article for a brand or create something new. Sharing my thoughts diary style like this is not quite so difficult as I’m just saying how things are and I don’t have to think hard to write.
Do Tough Times End?
So I asked myself, will this tough patch ever end? I know I am always unwell and that it’s always one thing or another affecting my adrenal Insufficiency. Sometimes it’s low Iron and I need an Iron infusion, other times it’s tooth problems caused by my steroid medication. Then I have the human growth hormone issues, Vitamin D issues and B12.
Every 7-8 weeks I have a period which makes me bed bound for a week or so and then on top of that I have a weak immune system which makes it easy to catch a virus or cold and infections.
I seem to have something making me unwell all the time and my health goes up and down. Whilst the tough times for me don’t seem to end, they do change. It’s just one thing after the other and it’s hard to deal with.
I’m hoping I can eventually get this anxiety under control and that I can get the pain I am feeling under control so I can concentrate better and get back into blogging more consistently, however I have a feeling it’s going to take some time and so my goals and plans are going to go on hold until 2020 as I just can’t do it right now.
Whilst the tough times caused by (adrenal insufficiency) and my ongoing health issues might improve and clam down, they can help me to become a tougher person. I can become stronger and learn from my experiences and I can get through this.
The chronic illness will always be here but I think with some help I can get on top of the anxiety and find a way to breath easier, panic less and cope better. I really think I can but it’s going to take time. Wish me luck.