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Childhood Bullying Is Not Okay

Childhood-Bullying

Childhood-Bullying

As a child I was bullied. I wont go into details but it affected my life in many ways. My self esteem was damaged, I hated going to school. It wasn’t the physical attacks, although they were painful but the verbal attacks which did the most damage. I recall telling my mother I wish I was dead. I was a small innocent 10 year old child, yet the experiences I was going through really were soul destroying.

Many of us may have heard the phrase, “Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me”. it’s not true.

It is the name calling, the verbal abuse, the teasing, the mocking. These are the things which can cause the most damage and parents, adults, teachers have a responsibility to stop when they are aware of it.

I once read a poem by John Bytheway called Sticks and Stones. I’m sharing the first and last verses.

Sticks and stones can break my bones but names can never hurt me.
but oh the hurt I feel inside when friends I,ve known desert me.
For now I,m left to walk the crowded halls of school alone,
And wonder whats been said today when the whispering is done.
Now if you want to break some bones some sticks and stones will do,
But if you want to break a heart just spread a lie or two.
‘Cause sticks and stones may break some bones, but broken bones can mend,
But spread around an evil fib and the hurt may never end.

I love this poem and it’s so so true. I hope as adults we all do our part when and if we see bullying taking place, whenever it is taking place. If we want to raise emotionally healthy children we need to protect and raise our voice against bullying. I am raising my voice.

I watched a wonderful video clip on Youtube where children “actors” bullied another child “actor” in front of adults to see how the adult would react. This was an uplifting video to see adults stand against bullying but at the same time it sent shivers down my spine as I heard words similar to those spoken to me as a child. I hope we can as adults do our part to ensure our children do not bully be it at school or out in public. This is my food for thought.

Angela milnes
Brilliant blog posts on HonestMum.com

14 Comments

  1. It’s so true. The psychological stuff is what stays with you. That’s a really great poem, I hadn’t read that before. I’d seen the clip going around. I hope that is actually how adults would react in that scenario, although my feeling is that people would be less inclined to step in. You’re right, it is everyone’s responsibility. Excellent post.

    1. I do think people would not want to always step in as they themselves may not know how to deal with it or worry about making matters worse. Some think we should lt children be children and get on with it but I think we have a duty if we know something is happening to do something even if it is speak to teachers or the right people. It is never an easy situation to be in..but awful for the kids/victims of bullying.

  2. wow that is a powerful watch, even though you know the girls are actors you can imagine these hurtful words being said for real. I’m heartened that people stepped in. It makes me wonder what the experience would be like if you repeated this experiment in the UK where people tend to stand back a bit more. My daughter had a horrible experience where a couple of older girls made fun of her (mimicking something she was doing). She didn’t tell me about it straight away but it she confided in me a few days later and she’d obviously really taken it to heart. Thank you for shining a light on an important subject.

    1. It is a powerful video and I’d like to hope adults would stand up for children but sadly it does not always happen. Some adults even laugh and think it’s funny or encourage their children. Clearly not sensible every day parents but there are bad eggs out there.

    1. I hate bullying too. It affected my childhood and later life and is now happening to my daughter. I cant stand it and need to do what i can to prevent it! Angela

  3. I was bullied as a child and had to move house because of it. It was terrifying and i lost all of my friends. All the other children just thought it was funny. I work is a school which is hot on bullying. As an adult i could not/would not stand by and watch a child being bullied.

    1. me too. I can not stand bullying. I now realise as an adult that a lot of the things I went through was done by kids who’s parents were not exactly good role models. I dont want my daughter to be bullied but it is happening and it breaks my heart and knocks her self esteem and i hate it!

  4. I love the fact that every adult did step in to help the little girl. I totally agree that the psychological torment would be worse than the physical. As children, they really do care what others think of them and it must be soul destroying to be the one they all make fun of! #brillblogposts
    Debbie

    1. Yes, I love this video. It is awesome and so important! Bullying is wrong and it can really damage children! I’ve seen it’s effects too many times and will always stand up against it!

  5. What a brilliant video, truly heartwarming 🙂 I’m so sorry you experienced bullying, what you said to your mum is so sad. I dread the day that T comes home and said someone was mean to him, it would absolutely break my heart to know someone was cruel to my wonderful sweet little boy. I’d like to think I would stand up for someone being bullied like in the video.

    1. I loved this when I saw it and had to write about it as it’s a subject close to my heart. I don’t think any mother wants their child to be bullied. We have experienced it with my daughter three times and it is awful!

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